Circles

[swiftsnowmane]

 aka, my Ahsoka & Anakin/Vader song

Watch on YouTube

In my mind, this is Ahsoka singing to Anakin...as himself, her beloved master during the Clone Wars, and as Vader, her 'enemy'; at whose side she nonetheless vows to remain, symbolically, forevermore.


you know
the fire’s running low
can you feel the flame
her fading glow

you know
we are slowing down
I can hear your footsteps drowning out

we’re burning out, we’re burning down
we’re the ashes on the ground
we’re burning out, we’re burning down
we’ve fallen underground

you are
you’re singing our song
but your heart is somewhere else I know
we are
we’re trying to belong
pick up the pieces left of us

we’re burning out, we’re burning down
we’re the ashes on the ground
we’re burning out, we’re burning down
we’ve fallen underground

if you could see me running up to you
you’d know
I’ve been running in circles ‘round you
if we could turn the hours back in time
you’d know
I’ve been running in circles for you

we’re burning out, we’re burning down
we’re the ashes on the ground
we’re burning out, we’re burning down
we’re falling underground

the light
has fallen from the stars
now we are sinking through the night
out of sight
we’ve fallen underground
pick up the pieces left of us

if you could see me running up to you
you’d know
I’ve been running in circles ‘round you
if we could turn the hours back in time
you’d know
I’ve been running in circles for you

we’re burning up, we’re burning down
we’re the ashes on the ground
we’re burning out, we’re burning down
we’ve fallen underground

we’re burning up, we’re burning down
we’re the ashes on the ground
we’re burning out, we’re burning down
we’ve fallen underground

you know
the fire’s running low


The feels this song gives me for these two are unreal. The imagery of 'falling down' and 'falling underground'  just fits them so well, both throughout the course of TCW, and during their climactic encounter in Rebels. The line 'you're singing our song, but your heart is somewhere else, I know' is so powerfully reminiscent of the heartwrenching scene when Ahsoka leaves the Jedi Order, and tells Anakin that she 'knows' he has long wished to leave it as well, hinting strongly that she understands that this is, in large part, due to his love for Padme. ('Our song' meaning the 'song' of the Jedi Order/religion itself.)  And 'we are...we're trying to belong', just sums up the entirety of both Anakin and Ahsoka's story during the Clone Wars period -- both of these characters trying, and failing, to 'belong' in a Jedi Order that is itself becoming increasingly clouded by darkness. Anakin, whose dearest wish is simply to finally, one day, have a family of his own;  Ahsoka, for whom the Order *is*, up to that point, the only family she'd ever known.

Then comes the line, 'the light has fallen from the stars/now we are sinking through the night', and I'm already tearing up, because Anakin is, of course, himself frequently compared to a falling or dying star. And when he falls, night, too, falls upon the galaxy. And indeed, in TotA, Ahsoka quite literally 'falls underground', down into the depths of the Sith Temple on Malachor. And there she meets the 'dragon of that dead star', the embodiment of Death to the galaxy. The character who, at this point in his tormented existence, represents the death of dreams, and worst nightmares come true'. Darth Vader, the Reaper. Anakin Skywalker, the fallen star himself.

And then, the bridge starting with 'if you could see me running up to you, you'd know, I've been running in circles for you....' just hits me so hard. It evokes the scene when Ahsoka runs up behind Vader and slices off part of his mask, revealing the face of Anakin to her sight. And not only does it bring to mind that fateful moment, but also the fact that both of them have been running in circles for each other for a long time -- he, hunting her, first through the Coruscant Underworld, and then later across the galaxy as he does all 'Jedi', and she, searching endlessly for a sign, any sign, that something of the one she knew -- the one who taught her everything -- might have survived.  Searching, unknowingly, for that 'barest flicker of persistent light'....and finding it there, in that darkest of all places.

This song is just so haunting and means so much to me, and I would love nothing more than to create a fan vid for it using intermingled clips from The Clone Wars and Star Wars: Rebels. Sadly, it shall remain but a dream for the time being as I currently lack both the skills and tools to make this happen. For now, enjoy the beauty and melancholy of this gorgeous track that I associate so strongly with my beloved Snips and Skyguy.




"...you know, the fire's running low."